Welcome to the Garden of

Jean Cowger

Age	31
Location	Martinsville
Last Seen	December 5, 2008
Joined	August 26, 2008
Gifts Given	0
Candles Lit	10
Tributes Written	2
Memorials Created	2
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About Jean

I'm a mama, that's my job & love in life. I'm also a wife & a woman, but my
first name is always Mama. From time to time I hear people say how strong or
brave they see me, for living everyday & able to laugh still after having so
many of my kids die in my arms but I don't think of it as brave or strong, just
no other choice of what to do besides take it one day at a time. I gave up on
trying to make sense of the pain & just live day to day in the best way I see
possible at that time. Now I've got 2 kids walking the earth with me so I have
to smile for them no matter whats in my heart. most days I can deal with it, out
of habit or what not sure but I do somehow, but even on the dark days I know my
babies are right beside me walking in my shadow, holding my hand. As for knowing
what gender my babies were, ultrasounds told me the multiples (& in some of
them, the sexes) but unfortunately I never thought it'd be the only picture I'd
have of some of them or I'd of had them print out pictures for me. couple of
them I made it to 4 1/2 mos but most of them were between 9 & 14 weeks. as for
the sexes, every time I've gotten pregnant then I just 'knew' what sex the baby
was, just a very strong, definate feeling each time. with the ones that made it
long enough to tell & with the 2 that were born alive then I could tell I'd been
right. I named all of them, even the youngest ones, cause I know they are real
people so it didn't feel right to let them die without a name.